Talk:Arlington National Cemetery

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Simple English Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Not simple[change source]

This article is almost word for word from En. It isn't at all simple. It might be better to just take the intro from En and put time into simplifying that rather than copying and pasting the whole things and only simplifying a few sentences. As an example, the section below is an exact copy from En.

When Virginia announced its decision, Lee resigned his commission and took command of the armed forces of the Commonwealth of Virginia, later becoming commander of the Army of Northern Virginia. He quickly established himself as an able commander, defeating a series of Union generals, until his final defeat and surrender at the McLean House. Because of this decision and subsequent performance, Lee was regarded as disloyal by most Union officers. The decision was made to appropriate a portion of Arlington as a graveyard for mostly Union dead.

The Flesch-Kincaid grade level is 12.3 and these words are not simple: defeat, defeating, generals, subsequent, surrender, commonwealth, graveyard, disloyal. Commission is also used in a specific way that is not simple.

Others might simplify this differently, but here goes...

Lee quit being an officer in the Union army when Virginia said it was leaving the United States. He became the leader of the armed forces of the Commonwealth of Virginia. He then became commander of the Army of Northern Virginia. Lee soon showed that he was a good commander. He won battles against several Union generals. But, in the end, he lost and surrendered at the McLean House. Most Union officers thought Lee had broken his promises to the Union because he chose to fight against them. Part of Arlington was taken away from the Lee family and became a graveyard. Mostly Union dead are buried there.

The Flesch-Kincaid grade level is 5.3 in this example. I'm sure this could be improved. There are still some difficult words such as graveyard, but they are linked (even though one is still red). I removed passive constructions where I could--that improves readability. Thanks, Gotanda (talk) 08:04, 27 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]